Love letter to 2AlQ, 3CG and 3EF

   As much as I love my school for the continuing support they give, I can’t help but felt sad for the reality of not being able to fight till the end because of what you are on paper – I’m an English linguistic grad but not an English teacher….”You can never please all” is what I came to understand, I was thankful also that I could still teach 2 classes (which I really appreciate my KP for defending my class for me after showing my tripod results and all). But nothing comes without sacrifice; I sacrificed 3 of my beloved classes. Right from the beginning when I was given 4 PT3 classes, I was worried I couldn’t focus enough, but I took up the challenge and survived (thinking that last year I got all pass for 1 class I was given the opportunity to teach).  

  Seeing how one fellow in school actively promoting the use of ELT by bonding with her kids really struck me hard, kinda. A rural school, as well, limited exposure, yeah checked. Speaking English with me at first? Nah, they would rather ask their friends. Why? Lack of vocabulary, shy and not confident (some of them still are up till today). But as time passes, they showed improvements (with the help of Scholar Dollar too – positive reinforcements). 

A letter to my beloved students,

  Dear 3Canggih, you’re the first class I have to let go and I want to do extra class with you, just to spend time with you. But I’ve got too many things on my plate. But am always glad to help if you need me. 

  Dear 3Efisien, my ‘manja’ class (as I’m their class teacher), sometimes I hear a few complains from a few teachers. A class where there are a mix of those who couldn’t study, apathetic, and also hardworking ones. All in all, they’re a good bunch of kids, so, I focus on their character building and speaking (after all, language should be a tool for communication). Occassionally, they’ll work in the kind of pin drop silence which will amaze you. Mind you, NOT sleeping. Sometimes, it could be downright frustrating and annoying to get them to do work, I can see they are trying very hard to stay focus while I go on speaking simple “alien” language with body language but they just couldn’t. And, I know that I can’t blame them. But I nagged them anyway, because the main reason was they slept late. But, we did singing, playing Kahoot, modules and cutting newspaper articles. Yesterday, I was a little surprised when they actually remember my long-winded STAR values (I use it for all my classes, Sej or Eng) because normally they would read from their notebook but they’ve submitted for checking. I was touched that they could remember (it’s my weakest class) and after constant reminder, they internalise some of them.Late to class is never a big problem to me. I just wish I could have more time to let them believe in I want! I can! I will!.

Besides poor attendance, I’m quite glad they’ve not commit any serious disciplinary problems in school. 

Dear 2 AlQudwah, 

When I first broke the news that I may not teach, some of them genuinely expressed their disappointment. Putting up a professional manner, I actually told them that it’s okay, you could always ask me if you need help and that you should still practice my STAR because those are values you should practise in life. I also said that they shouldn’t stop speaking English just because I won’t be teaching them. Making it cool. But deep down, not cool at all.

Later that night, some of them said they don’t want a new teacher, being a novice in ELT, being told that they want me is a recognition. And I actually miss them too, they’re a fun bunch, always cheering me up. I’ve always told them that they’re the future leaders and so they should be thinking something or doing something to contribute. Hence, I brought them to Leaps of Knowledge Global Goals, afterwards they did presentation and reflection. Before that, I had done a week of problem-identifying to develop their critical thinking skills and collaboration. Yesterday was my official last day with them, I was dreading to say that that was my last class but I told them anyway, and I wasn’t sure if it was just me but I felt the atmosphere plunged into silence. When they recite STAR it wasn’t as usual. Nonetheless, we did grammar practice, took a group photo (with Najah, Aisyah and Ain in our mind) and we had war of Pictionary. Had a good laugh with them. And we spent our precious last 2 hours together…

PS: Al-Qudwahans and Efisieners, your SD will still be given based on your academic and STAR performance. So keep collecting. 🙂 

Saying that nothing’s going to change, that’s a lie. Just like I thought I could spend time like I used to with my 3 Canggih was a lie. I am really going to miss my classes, the time in class, the fun we had…It feels incomplete. Adapting…still adapting…lucky I have got the upcoming projects to keep my mind occupied.

I may not be your best English or class teacher, but I hope the knowledge, matters or values I share with you are useful for life. I wish you all the best and I’ll see you around in school still. 


Teacher (20/7/2016)





The big fuss to die when he actually can…

   Wasn’t sure it was coincidence or fate that I kept coming across Me Before You (subconsciously recognising with the bright fiery red colour the actress wore) but I dismissed the thought of checking it out because 1) not the work of the usual author I read and 2) thought it’s some romance chick flick. Until two days ago that I just randomly had a “hey why don’t I check it out” thought for that movie while checking showtimes for my not through Through the Looking Glass movie (pffft). I watched the trailer and the decision making moment was when I saw the phrase “live boldly”.
  Asked my cousin if she’s interested, she is and then bought ticket. As told by the review in The Star, recent melodramatic movies are rated by the standards of whether the viewers cried. Well, if so, I think it was quite a tear-jerking film with questionable values underlying the typical romance film. I quite like “Finnigan” on how he conveyed his messages through only facial expressions, I only recognised him when he appeared on screen. But…in terms of facial expressions, I think Emilia Clarke (known as Lou in the film) is better than Sam Claflin (loved his witty smile by the way). In the film, she showed that she has the power to make me not disgusted at her sometimes-out-of-the-place attire as she is full with positive energy despite how she’s treated by Will (by Sam Claflin).

  Long story cut short, I wept when I saw how helpless Lou felt. I wept when Lou cried and she hardly ever cries in more than half of the film. The underlying message isn’t clear enough though, is it intended or it’s just because the director wanted to focused on the bonding between Will and Lou? I think it is necessary to show how the process is to the viewer, to educate, doesn’t agree doesn’t mean cannot know.  Nonetheless, what would you do if you’re in Lou’s shoes? Or in Will’s parents’ shoes? It’s one of the toughest decisions one has to make I think (no spoiler intended). 
  Been meaning to post this since last night but no internet connection. Anyway, had a good chat with one of the most fave persons in my world and he triggered me that hey…actually if he really wanted to die, why not just stopped taking medication, or if he’s attacked by pneumonia, why not just let him be? Why the big fuss to fly all the way to Switzerland? And what did Lou see when he asked her to open the door?

Those are the questions that I’ll leave you to ponder.


Love this photo especially, because of the quotes.

Signing off,

The world works in mysterious ways

I had a random encounter with this drama in search of teaching materials for my Japanese extra class next year. Its title Algernon ni Hanataba wo (Flowers of Algernon), originally written by Daniel Keyes, I simply clicked in as I was attracted by the poster with Yamashita and the synopsis of the drama is quite interesting.


Algernon ni hanataba wo

It showed the trauma Sakuto had as a child led him to have a wish to become smart to please his mother and how he was granted the wish but only for a short while. I personally agree to the end of the movie, though it pains me a little, I think that it is how the universe works, you gained something, you lost something.

This drama also struck me that there are people out there struggling to become better, why do I still complain that I’m not good enough when I haven’t tried hard enough? And that people will use their own way, in sacrificing what matters most to them, to contribute to the society. Like what Sakuto did. He may stand a chance, but he decided not to.

On a lighter note, I also liked how the background setting was florist and the music used was simply touching to the
soul – The Rose.

I woke up and the first that came to my mind was this drama. This story contains many perspectives and more importantly, it makes you think. You should give it a try if you haven’t read or watch this story.

Reflection on pre-Merdeka night

Sunday night, hot and humid day, crammed up in my newly (well, it’s been a month or so) arranged study. Listening to the show my mother turned to (Astro AEC 301 – 3 years 8 months with its tagline “History can be forgiven, but not forgotten” ) – showing the experience sharing by the ones who had experienced the Japanese occupation in Malaya during WWII. It’s the 2nd episode started on last Sunday at 9pm. The 1st episode I had my student over to watch as it is related to History (well, I’m a History teacher at heart).

Although I knew from movies that Japanese had been very cruel in ways (all sorts of way you can never imagine), listening from the live witness makes me questioned what exactly were they thinking to have made them behaving that way?! A live witness said, “early in the morning, you could see the girls walking back home, bloody, naked (think on your own what happened)”. She (was a little girl back then) further added that all girls were afraid to leave home as any girl sighted by the Japanese army will be (you know what happened).

Living in the now makes me very grateful and thankful and constantly reminding myself of not taking the peace now for granted. It has been 58 years now since we gained Independence. We earned Independence by the sacrifice and suffer from our ancestors. Today, is the day before our beloved Father of Independence proudly break the news of us gaining Independence officially at Dataran Merdeka. I love my country, thus, I feel that my current profession now is my littlest way of contributing to my country – to groom the future leaders of our nation. Yet, I feel sad that it seems like our country is in danger of allowing its downfall. It also saddens me to see that some of our people are judging not by one’s conduct but by one’s skin colour. “In this world, there are only two kinds of people – the good and the bad” – My Name is Khan.

Instead of complaining and pointing fingers, why won’t we work together to solve the problem? Why don’t we think of ways to make better of the situation?

“In the name of justice

Wake up and form ranks

sons of our ancestors

Be brave

And erect a wall of people

Stand up heirs of our freedom” – Marzuki Ali

Hence, patriotism is what we should all have. Action speaks louder than words. Remember what our forefathers have taught us, peace and freedom comes with understanding, tolerance and unity. Together we stand united. Happy 58 Merdeka. And more years of Merdeka to come.



Love thy country like you like thyself

We are all Malaysians. Love thy country like you like thyself

Deloitte IMPACT day at SMK Jeram 2015

Woke up early (7am) to head school to prepare for welcoming Deloitte team to our school. In the midst of being confused with whether I should carry on attending a workshop I was assigned yesterday or stay in school assisting my collab – Shahrun in preparing. Attended the toolbox meeting, cleared confusion, stayed back and helped out then now in Pusat Kegiatan Guru Jeram (which I just found out its existence today as I always go to the one in Kuala Selangor XP).

Anyway, back to Deloitte IMPACT Day, it’s an opportunity that our school so luckily manage to seize, through Teach for Malaysia. They will be here to deliver Student Leadership Workshop to the Form 4 kids besides helping to beautify our school with volunteers (whom I heard came from some universities).

Deloitte Student Leadership Workshop 2015

Deloitte Student Leadership Workshop 2015

Deloitte representatives and SMKJ officials

Deloitte representatives and SMKJ officials

During my time there, I observe that the Deloitte team are very eager to kickstart by preparing stations for the kids.It’s still ongoing now so I shall update to you guys soon. 🙂

P/S: the person speaking in front is Mr. Nizar (son of our current PM). 🙂

My fave spaghetti – Salmon Aglio Olio

I used to only cook the red sauce or cream sauce from tinned can or Prego but ever since my friend, Ayun who shared me a wonderful recipe. I’ve been cooking only that (with more or less the same ingredients but sometimes a bit more sumptuous) and my mother loves it too. So tada~ quick Aglio Olio.  

Main ingredients (serving for 2):

2 cloves of garlic, broccoli, 2 small bell pepper, button mushroom (have yet to find fresh ones near my place so canned one will do), spaghetti 


Oyster sauce, olive oil (2 spoonful), parsley (though I’m using thyme now, not as nice as parsley), ground black pepper. 

Visitors from Celcom. 

It started off with a random conversation with my friend, Joyce, about the problems I face in starting a literacy project in my area. Then, she said why don’t she connect me with Celcom that has been helping her school in her Porject ID. Hence, two beautiful souls are assigned to help me out, from scratch. Literally. I’ve been having this idea, yet due to the responsibilities given and commitment to thesis. I was very reluctant to even try to think about it. 

Yes, so the two Celcom management trainees assigned to help me are Aishah and Cindy. Both displaying great patience and kindness to my kids despite them far from being the best. Yet. 🙂 So, after discussion, we have arranged a day (Thursday) to come to visit my school area to research on how best we could execute the idea with omitted resources but great impact. The students, despite being awkward, were very happy that there are people coming to visit them. 

Too bad no photo was taken, thanks to my kept-saying-insufficient-space phone, but hey, memories are meant to be kept in mind right?? Thus, yeah! Am looking forward to the day of execution! I’ve got a volunteer already, I hope. Erhem, JKw. *grin* 

Alright, time for my besties gathering. Happy Sunday everyone! 

An inspiring person – The Jungle Teacher

Just found out that he actually blogs (The Jungle Teacher) (lol, am always slow but better late than never, right? XD ) Anyway, being an inspiring teacher, he not only inspires his kids but fellows & alumni (like me). Heard his keynote speech in a summit last time when I was a fellow and it was encouraging. This year,  he helped me out when I need professional advice and teaches me as well (through his presentation shared below).

It makes me realize that the community is actually out there to help if you reach out to the right people. And I am thankful for having to know that. It keeps me going.

#superhero #jungleteacher keep fighting! We are in this #forthekids and to build a better future. 🙂

Thank YOU for your support. For the kids. 

I’be blogged about this but somehow it has disappeared )O.0( !!!! And so here is my second attempt, my double appreciation to those of YOU out there who have been supporting me these four years of becoming a teacher. May many more to come! ^_^ 

Thank YOU who gave me the opportunity to join this profession.

Thank YOU who support me in whatever I do.

Thank YOU who always inspire me. 

  Thank YOU ❤


Upgraded Pendekar Arnab with logo this year. Thank you pendekar! #pforest


 Following Pendekar Arnab comes Cicak. Thank YOU too~

To teachers/educators out there, know that all your hard work is appreciated by the community if not our own students! Keep fighting in creating a better generation for our nation. #teachersday2015

What teachers do…

What TFM and music does to me.

Wesak day, (a day to celebrate the birth of Buddha)

A day of reflecting what I have been doing in the past. in the flow writing about Teach for Malaysia for an article for MELTA. “See You Again” popped in my mind and it is downloaded, listened. The start of the song is mellifluous yet heartbreaking.

Mixed emotions. Both about my journey – how much I have learned and grown from joining TFM (both personal and professional) and the images of Fast and Furious 7 where Paul Walker lives in the world where family is the most important thing besides car racing. (Still feel so sad when the scene where Toretto and Brian is replayed with the song)

How does Wesak or Vesak related to TFM?

Wesak is about bringing happiness to people, am I doing it now? Buying pigeon or tortoise or visiting homes of less fortunate? No. I do not think this should be the only day that we should do that but it is a day of awareness. I think doing good should be done throughout our life. I think, me, joining TFM, bringing impact to kids’ lives is one of the ways I have been contributing in bringing happiness.

By seeing kids’ smiles or respect to you when they see you is all you would’ve wanted, even from the ones you do not teach, saying that you have inspired them to be a better person and made them grateful of having meeting you is all you need to move on and keep pushing yourself to do better for them. This year is my 4th year of teaching and I’m still active in alumni community by doing my best in engaging alumni.

“We’ve come a long way from where we began, I’ll tell you all about it when I see you again” “See you again” is a song that reminds me of TFM. Along the journey, I’m also grateful for those who have been supporting me outside TFM. Know that I heart you all.

#TFM #alumni #forthekids #education #betterfuture #nationbuidling

*still playing*

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